On the eve of turning 30

Somebody somewhere once decided that 30 is the age you officially get old. The fun, carefree 20s are over and now it's time to be a Real Grown Up. I'm never sure what exactly that entails, but I imagine it's something like pension plans, sensible shoes and trips to Ikea on a Saturday.

The world tells me that turning 30 is a big deal. So big, it seems, that there are think pieces in Huffington Post and Vox on learned life lessons, things you should no longer do and, in an attempt at a positive spin, why life actually begins at 30 (as if I've been stuck in limbo this whole time).

According to society, there are a number of things I should have achieved by now. These include having a high-flying career, owning a house, getting married, having children, publishing a book/creating an app/starting a business/winning a prestigious prize and traveling Asia with nothing but a backpack and my joie de vivre.

I have done none of these things.

And, much to my dismay, I've found myself buying these lies the past six months. Hook, line and shameful sinker. Instead of focusing on the wonderful life I've lived and the adventures I have had, I've been caught up in all that I haven't done. Should I have dyed my hair pink and got a tattoo at Glastonbury? Should I have studied a Masters? Why oh why haven't I lived in a yurt in the Gobi Desert? Then there's the flip side of turning 30, the idea that I'm suddenly meant to be wise, calm and have my life figured out. Part of me feels like I'm still a kid. Like one day someone will find out that I'm just pretending and that I actually have no idea what I'm doing.

I know in reality nothing will change. That I'll wake up tomorrow and look the same and feel the same and act the same. And I know how blessed I am to have got to 30 with such a full life lived. Not everyone gets that privilege. So rather than reflect on my past and lament any regrets I might have, I'm going to focus on the future. On the things I want to learn and the things I have yet to achieve. Below I've listed just a few things that I want to do as I head into my next decade.

Live bravely

I'll let you into a little secret. I'm pretty damn scared of failing. No matter how many times it happens, it sucks every time and doesn't really get easier. But I don't want the fear of failure to keep me from attempting my life goals. I want to dream recklessly and go for what I want, regardless of whether I succeed. I'll try, I'll fail, I'll get rejected and I will get back up and keep on trying. And, hey, one day I'll get there.

Care less/ care more

Care less about the things that don't matter. Social media, appearances, material possessions, what people think about me. And care more about the things that do - kindness, being a good friend, being more selfless, showing love, combating injustice.

Be perpetually curious

The world is a place of wonder and colour and possibility. There's so much to see and do it's a bit overwhelming. I don't want to stay in a comfortable little bubble, I want to push the envelope. I want to learn and explore and travel and immerse myself in creativity. I want to burn as bright as possible (bright - geddit? Haha...oh).

Stay in my lane

My life's journey is not going to look exactly like someone else's and that's ok. So what if I have not done everything I thought I might have by this age? There's still time. I don't want to spend my life preoccupied on whether I'm...enough. Clever enough, pretty enough, fun enough, ambitious enough. God tells me I am, even if the world might not, and I aim to live in that truth.

So thanks 20s, you were pretty great. You bought me travel, education, jobs, friends, family and a greater sense of self. And here's to you 30s, I have a feeling you might be even better.